The Saddest Love Language

Valentine’s Day is not a big thing for us at all. During the extremely broke early years we could only afford to celebrate our anniversary which occurs a month after Valentine’s. I’m not kidding. We could only afford to celebrate one event in a month long period. It’s not like we were buying extravagant gifts for each other either. The point is that we never established Valentine’s as a couple. Over the years our anniversary has become a bit of a non-event as well. Welcome to over a decade of marriage!

But today! When I went to get Rolo her small gift, I also picked up a plant for Sergio. I should have warned you to hang on tight before I blew you over with my intensely romantic gesture! I got Sergio a gift for Valentine’s Day, and I think maybe that’s a first in our entire relationship.

He immediately felt bad that I hadn’t informed him we were suddenly doing this day. I responded, “If it takes Valentine’s to remind me to do something nice for you once a year then I think that’s okay.” That is the saddest thing you’ve ever heard, I know. When it comes to which of us is the romantic in this relationship, the one that thinks of others and does nice and unexpected things throughout the year for no reason at all, it’s not me. It’s all Sergio. I’m pretty much the worst.

What you (and hopefully Sergio) have to realize is that if I weren’t a married mother, I probably wouldn’t function like a person. Instead of feeding myself I would just eat an unpeeled cucumber and maybe…some skittles…in like a whole day? I know this is true because when Sergio is out of town I neither know what to eat or when to go to bed, and often just don’t. So everyday that I grocery shop, do dishes, put away laundry, eat a normal meal, and get gas in the car feels like I am doing something for someone other than myself. Like, I’m personing just for you!I wouldn’t person for myself! Is that weird? Needless to say, just functioning like a human being is not a noticeable way of caring about someone. Sometimes you gotta buy a bonsai tree to really get that sentiment out there.

Seriously though, with no forethought or planning we have had a delightful Valentine’s Day. Early morning fancy coffee, late breakfast, chilling around town, the gym. We’re now having steak and amazing homemade deep fried french fries. Rolo and I also made some funfetti cupcakes that we topped with food coloring experiments.

Maybe we’ll make this day a thing. People do, right?

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