In the world of all possible bad ideas, going to an ice park on a deep negative temperature night ranks way up high. Top ten. What is an ice park? It’s a park made of ice. Yup. Or maybe it’s closer to say it’s a small park devoted to ice? Sculptures mostly.

It’s lovely. I’m sure that it is lovely. I don’t really know.

My visit to the ice park went something like…

Spent all day hoping they would cancel the Girl Scout event so I could get out of going without losing face with my daughter.

Got really pissy about life as the time came to bundle up.

Spent 20 minutes adding layers of clothing to my child and myself.

Drove 15 minutes to the ice park.

Checked Rolo in as a Girl Scout and paid for myself.

Walked outside to the ice park and marveled at the train. Rolo spent 2 minutes playing in the train and I took pictures, taking my hands out of my overgloves but leaving my liners on.


Scurried to the next sculpture in the circle, less than thirty seconds. Took a picture.


Sprinted right by all the other sculptures without really looking, murmuring compliments as I went.

Found the slide. Realized Rolo needed a sled. Did math in my head about whether I could get back to the building porch and then back to the slide and still manage my warmth. Nope.

Rejoiced when another Girl Scout invited Rolo to ride.

Waited and hopped from foot to foot. Took my hands out of gloves again to take picture. No Rolo. I was watching the wrong slide.

She went again. I took a video. My phone died. FROM THE COLD!!!!!!!!

I bent over in pain trying to do anything with my double gloved and pocketed fingers. The girls went one more time.

Grabbed Rolo and offered to race her inside. Ran back through the park and inside. Put my hands straight under warm water.

Total time outside? 10 1/2 minutes.

Spent thirty minutes inside drawing and having snack.

Went back out, ran straight to the slide and let Rolo go down twice more in less than 4 minutes.

Noticed on the way back inside that there is an entire reindeer farm in the middle that we didn’t even see the first time despite having passed it twice.

Bolted straight to the car, put the heat on full blast and went home.

Recommendation: Go to the park on a day that is zero or above. I might be a weenie but you should trust the children. The children play outside in up to -20 degrees everyday at school, and even they got miserable pretty fast.



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